Wixee Fizzbottom

W ixee Fizzbottom is a goblin burglar, spy, and assassin. While her most lucrative work has been for the War Chief, she has in recent years also become closely associated with adventurer/fashion designer Ruinwen Lachenn. Profile W ixee might have been content to live her life racing customized cars and working as a mechanical engineer were it not for her obsession with celebrity style, which drove her and her friends during their teens to break into the homes of well-dressed notables, throw little parties there, and rob them of their wardrobes and bling. Sometimes Wixee and her friends sold what they took, but the flashier items they kept for themselves. This practice, of course, led to a couple of her cohorts getting found out and arrested, obliging Wixee to make the grim choice between eliminating them or risk being arrested herself. She chose the former, which cost her the love of most her remaining friends but gained the respect and interest of others in Kezan’s criminal circles. Thus began Wixee’s rise in the Bilgewater cartel as a thief, spy, and enforcer. After the Bilgewater exodus to Orgrimmar, Wixee extended her covetousness of celebrity-grade accessories to the blood elves and the Forsaken. Eventually her identity was discovered by none other than one of her favorite blood elf designers — Ruinwen Lachenn — who, rather than turning Wixee in to the authorities, offered her a job, for which Wixee would be paid in cash, the latest and greatest in Lachenn haute couture, and invitations to Ruinwen’s parties and other social functions.



This was — and remains — the beginning and the end of any bucket list Wixee may have had. Alliance raids come and go, zombie apocalypses run their course, and dragon conflagrations burn out. But looking fabulous and being the envy of all who behold you? That’s forever. Personality W ixee’s approach to life, the universe, and everything can be distilled to the motto: ''Want. Take. Have.'' Despite her fondness for the finer things in life, Wixee remains very much a creature of the Bilgewater slums in all other respects. She is, for example, very loud and opinionated about things of which she clearly has no legitimate knowledge (“orcs can’t float because their bone density ain’t right for it!”), and touchy about her humble beginnings in a way that tends to underscore them (“Yeah bitch, I do know that sculpture because it was sitting on my night table when I used to ride your husband!”). This often makes Ruinwen’s obligation to take Wixee to parties with the rich and famous an embarrassing affair. In matters of the heart, Wixee’s no stranger to hook-ups, but is wistful about romance. “All the good ones are in jail,” she laments. She’s callous about death and dying, as many in her profession are, but remains strangely optimistic about her own eventual death in that she firmly believes that you can take it with you, and has built a subterranean mausoleum so that all her earthly wealth can accompany her to the next world when the time comes.



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